Then these feeling are compiled with my always present guilt. I don't know if it's just me, or all moms experience this...but I am always feeling guilty. For example:
- I am feeling guilty that I didn't make something more nutritious for dinner for Abby.
- Logan smiles and laughs every time I take a moment to talk to him...I feel guilty that I do not take more time to talk to him.
- I feel guilty that I yelled at Abby to "WALK UP THE STAIRS!!" (she'll sit and each stair for like 30 seconds...and by stair #15 I'm beyond irritated!)
- I feel guilty for not having the house more clean
- for not having John's clothes ironed
- or not shipping Weston's present yet (I know you don't mind Becca)
- for not playing more with Abby
- for making Logan sit in his bouncy while I type this
- for not putting any work hours in today--which makes it impossible for me to catch up so then I feel guilty for getting paid
- for not running on the treadmill
- for not reading my bible
Perhaps guilty is the wrong word...maybe it's failure. I always feel like my head is just about to go under water. I feel like I'm failing. I feel like I cannot give 100% in all areas of my life. wheww...it's exhausting just typing all of my failures! :) I don't mean to be a downer...but it's nice to write out everything and get it off my mind.