The blessings of sacrifice

I have been known (mostly by my husband) to complain about the required selflessness that accompanies motherhood. Don't get me wrong, I have not mastered the "selflessness" concept, in fact, I think I'm just beginning to understand it. Motherhood is odd, in that it requires around the clock sacrifice. As a mother, there is never a moment in my day (or night) that I'm "off the clock." If my children require a nap, I cancel plans. My wardrobe is planned around nursing, playing in the mud, and chasing toddlers. My sleep is always interrupted, my meals consist of chicken nuggets and applesauce, I do not get time alone with my husband, etc.
Now, it's not like I walk around in total irritation all of the time because I am a mother...I hope I haven't portrayed that! It's just during the moments when I am tired that I fight these types frustrations.


Very recently I began to see the sacrifices of motherhood as more of a blessing than a hardship. In fact, I am realizing how truly grateful I am for this aspect of motherhood. Not much else in life requires so much of oneself. And having so much required of me prompts me to seek the Lord. To ask for patience. To ask for wisdom. To give thanks! To praise the Lord that He chose me to be the mother of Abigail and Logan. I am also beginning to see the good stuff that comes from me giving myself to my family. For one thing, takes the focus off of ME! Making decisions based on the needs of others is a good thing. Not having the opportunity to be lazy, although annoying, is a good thing! There is not a lot of room to be self absorbed. There is no place for vanity--that was birthed out of me with my children, who left me with stretch marks and a changed figure. It is difficult to be a narcissist when there's no time to think about me.

Although these changes are difficult and I'm not always graceful about them, I am so grateful for this aspect of motherhood. I know it is making me a better person.



Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows
James 1:17


Saying Goodbye

Peter, Becca, Weston, and Sierra are getting ready to return to Mongolia. Yesterday we all said goodbye to one another.

Sad. That we won't see them for a few years.

Blessed. That I have family I am close with.

Grateful. For the time we have had together these last nine months.

Hard. Knowing that my sister will be far away and lonely.

Proud. That they have the dedication and faith to walk the life God has planned for them.

Aware. That time will go fast, as it always seems to do, and we will all see each other soon.

Believing. That the God we serve is big and can make himself known in spite of poverty, confusion, a struggling country, idolatry, fear, and spiritual darkness.

Trusting that there will be some incredible stories from Mongolia very soon.


The Evolution of Naps

It would be a huge underestimation to say that naptime is important to me. Some days I live for nap time. I've always been a bit intense about ensuring that my children get a nap- at the same time. However, as my kids grow naptime has evolved...unfortunately. From my experiences, it goes a little something like this:

I bring my beautiful new girl (or boy) home from the hospital. I'm eager to watch their every move. I want to facilitate some type of interaction. I want to gaze into their tiny new eyes. But, all they do is sleep (at least during the day). They just lay there, wrapped in a warm blanket and slumber. A dog can bark, a jet can fly overhead, the phone can ring, the sibling can scream...and there is my newborn child....resting...without interruption. Darn, if only they'd wake up so that we can get to know one another.

Six Months:
Wow, this kid is up a lot more now during the day, and still up every three hours at night. Sheesh, I'm tired, but how fun is it that my child now talks baby talk, sits up, interacts....it is so fun...I'm sure I'll get more sleep tonight.

One Year:
My beautiful and active child takes two long naps each day. One in the morning and one in the afternoon. It's great. Allows me to get some things done. Allows me some rest if I need it. Two breaks a day, not bad.

18 Months:
Shucks, my kid has dropped that lovely morning nap. Well, at least he'll sleep a bit longer this afternoon. But wait, he's crazy tired at like 10am...that's not gonna work. I'll have to keep him awake until at least noon. That's two more hours....perhaps we should go to the park to keep his mind off of sleep. But I can't drive b/c he'll fall asleep in the car....if he sleeps in the car, even for 12 seconds, he'll think that he's napped, and I'll have a grumpy toddler on my hands for the rest of the day!

Two Years:
I'm so tired I think I'm going to cry, or die. This two year old is giving me a run for my money. She is so sassy. She screams a lot. Everything is a battle. Oh, there's only three more hours until nap time. Sweet, sweet nap time. That will buy me enough sanity to make it until bed time. I can do this.

My three year old is growing out of naps! Good gracious! This cannot be happening to me! Why do I deserve this? Should this be happening already? She wakes up at 6:15am every morning which means she'll be right by my side for .....ug....14 hours until it is bedtime! Don't get me wrong...I love my child....she's gorgeous, she's inquisitive, she's smart, she's caring....she's opinionated, she asks me "why?" about 419 times a day, she's still got that temper tantrum thing going on....
I wish she would sleep like she did when I brought her home from the hospital!


Learning about boys

There are many lessons and observations that I am learning as I raise my boy. A new one was presented this morning when I heard what sounded like a waterfall noise. What the heck is that I thought? I looked up and see my son with his little man part pulled straight up and just ever so slightly peaking out of the top of his diaper

and he is peeing

straight up into the air

and all over the TV stand

and he is cracking up.

I must admit it was a funny site- my boy amusing himself with his ability to pee straight into the air.


What we've been up to

Dodger game, birthday parties, playing in the backyard, bounce house, playing with cousins, playing in the hot sunshine, playing at the park, playing at Aunt Becca's house, playing, playing, playing. whew! I'm tired just thinking about it! =)


Have I mentioned...

that Abigail is in a big girl bed now?? She was very excited, but then had a melt down and screamed for us to take it away, but then was very excited again. Wheww, after the emotional rollercoaster, Abby is now a little girl in a little girl room.


A typical day as a mom...

Today I woke up early with my little boy. We watched cartoons together while he drank his bottle. As he sipped on his morning juice, he played with my eyelashes--sometimes violently. I finally had to restrain his willing little hands. He yelled baby babble profanities at me for a few minutes.

Abigail yelled from her new big girl bed, "Mama, I awake." I went in to get her and handed her a cup of chocolate milk stat!

We watched more cartoons, they ate breakfast, Logan walked around naked for a bit until I could catch him, pin him down long enough to get a diaper on him. They tackled me, jumped on me, yelled at me, threw fits when they did not get their way, fought over toys, gave me kisses, Logan played with my eyelashes some more, Abby danced, Logan walked around babbling loudly, I took Abby to the potty, got them dressed and ready for the day.

This brings me to about 8:00am.

Long gone are the days of sleeping in. Lounging casually. Watching TV-at least the shows I want. Skipping breakfast. Watching movies all day.

The rest of the day consisted of snacks, lunch, dinner, two rounds of Popsicles, playing outside, Logan ate more bugs, Abby threw lots of dirt in the kiddy pool, chasing lizards, falling down, getting ouchies, kissing ouchies, cleaning up messes, Logan pooped on the rug (not sure how this happened because he had a diaper on), more cleaning, more cooking, more comforting, watching Cars, watching Peter Pan, watching Veggie Tales (boy sounds like a lot of TV, an internal battle I've stopped fighting), giving baths, PJ's, and finally bedtime.

Not eventful, but always busy.

I asked Abby, "why do you love your mommy?" She thought about it, and said, "I love my mama because she can pop like a puffer fish!"


O-well, she also thinks that Logan is "a little robot named Wall-E."

Happy Mother's Day to all Mother's everywhere.



It was a hot week and I have pictures to prove it!



Abby and Logan have enjoyed having their cousins close by these last eight months. I have enjoyed getting to know my niece and nephew. I have enjoyed watching the interaction between my children and my sister's children. I never realized how busy my sister and I have been having kids until they were all in the same room. Here is the breakdown:

Weston: age 4
Abigail: age 3
Sierra: age 2
Logan: age 1

Whew! I'm exhausted just typing it! :)

Weston is the leader of the bunch. He is very scientific. He is very smart. He likes to do things his way and expects everyone else to do the same. He always surprises me with his willingness to give me a big hug--he holds on very tight, and I appreciate that!

Sierra's middle name is Joy and I could not think of a better name for her. She is JOYFUL! She is always happy, always smiling, always wanting a hug, and always loving. She has become Logan's mother and is always concerned if he is upset. She loves when Abby plays with her, and will follow along happily with whatever game Abby invents. She is the most snuggley child I've ever met. She is a mama's girl, but will be just as content with Nana.

My sister and her family will be leaving in three weeks. It will be three years until I see them again and while I know that time goes so fast, I will miss them all so very much.

But, no time for goodbyes yet! We've got a lot to do before they leave town.