Yesterday evening, after a very stressful day, the kids were outside playing.
Abby started yelling for me, so I went to see what was going on.
She had big eyes and much excitement as she explained to me that
our trees had flowers!!!
I told her that it was because of Springtime.
She was thrilled.
I went inside to do the dishes.
Through the open screen door I heard my Abigail burst into song.

"God is not dead!"
"He makes beautiful things!"

Isn't that a beautiful and profound song for a three year old.
Abigail's innocent and uncomplicated faith in God catches me off guard daily.
My three year old unknowingly ministers to my heart and teaches me a thing or two about faith.


I have started my day at 4am the last two mornings.
Mommy says if I do it again, she'll take away my guns.


In about 30 hours my sister and her family will be in town!!!!!!!!!!!!
Although the reason for their visit is not a happy one (sick grandfather), I am so very excited to see my sister, brother-in-law, nephew and niece.
It has been just about a year since I've seen them all, so this quick whirlwind visit will be a wonderful little catch up before they return to Asia for a few more years.



The other day I was trying to have a conversation with my friend on the phone. What is it with kids when their mom is on the phone?? They immediately start asking for things. If nothing else, they are clever opportunist. Since I had already given fruit snacks, I refused to give any more sugar to buy a few more moments of chit chat. Abby was rummaging around the junk drawer and pulled out a bottle of bright blue liquid eyeliner. Once I painted hearts and stars on her face. I guess she remembered, eh? Before my conversation was over all three of us where painted bright blue. About 30 minutes later John came home from work, walked outside (where the kids and I were having a picnic) took a look at me and our children and just shook his head. haha. What?? So, I let our daughter paint me blue while I was talking on the phone. no biggie.


Last night I stood in the hallway and listened to John and Abby.
She was in bed and they were talking, something they do each night.
Every night I make sure to promptly dish out my kisses and leave her room so that her focus is just on daddy.
It is one of my favorite parts of the day.
As I disappear around the corner her heart belongs to daddy.
Last night I heard her asked him if he would call her his girlfriend.
*heart melting*
Their conversation went on and on, but who am I to make public their love talks?
Let's just say that my Abby is so very blessed to have her daddy.


Two words are dominating my home.
Star Wars.
Logan is completely obsessed.
Abigail is completely obsessed.
They even have hats.
And a lot of the characters.
And the token gift on Abby's birthday list is a

The force is strong in my little Jedi knights.

Even now, as I type, they are battling the dark side.
My the force be with me.


Yesterday i turned 32.

  • I ran around in the morning getting Abigail ready for school.
  • I only drank two sips of my coffee before I lost my cup somewhere in the house. By the time I found it I threw it out b/c it was cold. bummer.
  • I sprinted the kids into Abby's class and then out to the playground.
  • I said three prayers for Abigail. She still has moments of shyness and a difficultly letting mommy leave, so she will ask for a prayer. and another. and another. I do not mind. I love that she wants prayer. a good habit to have.
  • I took Logan to the park where I meet up with Jacqui and Carter. The boys played while we drank Starbucks--happy birthday to me!
  • I left the park, went to get Logan's hair cut. Took somethings back to Target. Shopped the $1 bin for Easter baskets.
  • Rushed to go pick up Abby. She looked soooo sick when I picked her up. watery eyes. runny nose. When my Abby gets sick it shows in her big blue eyes. I felt bad for her. She kept saying that she was not sick and she felt fine. sure.
  • Went home. Kids played. Lunch made. Naps, none. Yes Logan's present to me was yelling from his crib until I gave up on a nap and went to get him. great.
  • Took the kids for ice cream. Logan stole my mint and chip so I had to eat the cotton candy flavor. Abby informed me that she wanted mint and chip next time. noted.
  • Came home. Started dinner. Put dinner on the table. Nobody ate it. What, nobody likes fish?? I guess not. Spaghetti leftovers for them. Fish for me.
  • Abby was looking really sick by bedtime. Her checks were bright red. weird. I give her some medicine and got them settled in.
  • Logan is screaming. John discovers sand in Logan's crib. Lots and lots of sand. a mystery for sure? I just changed his sheets earlier that day. weird.
  • Abby is coughing up a storm and unable to sleep.
  • I help John with is big ol' final project thingy for is MA program.
  • I lay down on the couch.
  • I quickly relocate to bed. I have a feeling that Abby will be up a lot, so better get some type of sleep now.
  • 2am-5am Abby is up. She wants chocolate milk. She keeps coughing. I give in a give her the milk. bad mommy. tired mommy. I give her cough medicine. I lay in bed and listen to her cough. and cough. and cough. i pray that she'll feel better and get some sleep.
  • 5:03am, I am drifting back to sleep. Logan starts yelling my name. I get him some water and inform him he needs to go back to bed. I'm grateful he didn't put up a fight.
  • Currently, 8:54am and Abby is still sleeping. The first time in my life that one of my kids have slept in so late. I keep checking on her to make sure she is breathing. poor thing.
Throughout the day my mom called to sing me happy birthday. My dad called to tell me he loves me. My nephew called from Mongolia and sang me happy birthday. My sister and I had a chance to talk for a bit. My husband sent me love notes and love messages all day.

A busy day, but a blessed day.


We had a dance party the other night. DJ John was supplying us with some really good music. The kids were dancing their pants of. literally. Abigail had the camera and was taking some pictures. her new hobby. I was dancing, wrestling, and coughing a lot....i've been sick this week. no fun. i love my family. ♥



check this blog out. it is incredible. it has really made me think. to be honest, it have made me realize how little faith I have. I tend to plan first and pray last. Something that needs to change within me.


All of a sudden, like a flip of a switch, I realize that I might very well be out of baby mode for the rest of my life. It is very very likely that I may never ever have another baby. That really seemed to sneak up on me out of nowhere. John and I are really really on the fence about added any more children to our family. Most of the reasons are practical. And we are already running around like crazy with our two little ones. Could we handle a third? I'm sure we could if the Lord decided that another Attwood baby was on its way. But if we get a choice in it all, do we want anymore? hmmmm....the answer is looking more and more like no.

There is a part of me that feels so very sad about this realization. Just this morning I was on a walk with Logan. John and Abigail went to church so it was just me and my boy. I put him in the single stroller. This is a stroller I rarely use anymore because I need a double stroller, yet this is the stroller I used every single day when Abby was a baby. We would go on long, leisurely springtime walks all around Claremont. We would admire the beautiful trees and flowers. We would stop by the park and play before walking home. She was always so very content in that stroller. Just me and my girl. Walking. Content.

So this morning as my son was sitting contently in that stroller, it dawned on me that those days of walking around town, with no particular plan, no real place to be, just me and a baby--those days are over. When and how did this happen?

It makes me sad.

It makes me angry at myself that I didn't enjoy those days more. That I did not let the small stuff go a bit and just live in all the moments of having an infant with all those fun stages--nursing, crawling, babbling, learning to eat, etc.

Again, I wonder to myself, how in the world has this happened so very quickly!??

Note to self: make grand efforts to live each moment and enjoy every stage of Abby and Logan's lives.

Each time I chat with an older woman--one whose children are grown, she will always say something like "enjoy it, it goes by so quick."

I always say that I'll do my best to enjoy it, as my children are pulling at my legs, whining in my ear, or eager to have my attention.

But you know what--it is my goal this week to make a concerted effort to enjoy and welcome my little leg pullers because one day they won't be so eager to have my attention, they won't be pulling on my legs, or asking me to play. They'll be gone, and the thought of that makes my heart very heavy.

Thank you Lord for my Abigail and my Logan.


Watch out pony dolls.
The Barbies are on your turf.


4:30pm is usually a difficult time. The kids are tired and getting hungry. I need to start dinner. I'm tired and ready for John to come home. This week I found a solution to this problem. Plan meals that are easy for kids to be involved with. One of the best was tortilla soup. The kids each took turns dumping ingredients into the soup pot. They were thrilled! It tasted good too!


Abigail's been begging to take pictures with my camera. I finally agreed. Here are some shots from a 3 year old's point of view.


I've been researching food a lot these days. I came across this article about McDonald's Chicken Nuggets. It is pretty sad that food can be so awful and completely legal to sell. Here's an article snippit....yuck....

Here's a fun fact: their "chicken" is actually, at most, 44 percent chicken. The rest is mostly corn, salt, preservatives, and a few other interesting nasties.
When someone orders chicken nuggets, it's generally understood that you're getting chicken, not corn. Unfortunately, corn is extremely abundant in this country and is easy to establish crops of in others, and so corn and corn products compose the majority of McDonalds "chicken" nuggets.
Yes, I absolutely have to use the quotation marks. Sue me.

There are 38 ingredients in the McDonalds "chicken" nuggets.

Of them: the chicken (which is fed genetically altered corn, by the way. But is that really much of a surprise?), modified cornstarch (without this, the "chicken" nuggets would not be able to hold themselves together, due to the extreme processing of the nugget.), emulsifiers (so that the fats and the moisture in the nuggets do not separate, forming a nasty clot-like knuckle of nugget.), dextrose (it's a sugar.), chicken broth (a source of moisture and some flavor that has been leeched out of the nugget by the processing of the product.).

Yellow corn starch and more modified cornstarch are added to make the batter.

Even more cornstarch is used as a filler in the nugget itself. Following that, other fillers include vegetable shortening and partially hydrogenated corn oil (a source of trans fat; particularly nasty trans fat, as well.), and citric acid (about the only even slightly natural thing about the nuggets.)

Interestingly, perhaps even moreso than the above, are ingredients actually purchased from chemical plants that go into the "chicken" nuggets.

Aluminum phosphate and calcium lactate help prevent the rancid vegetable fats in the nuggets from starting to rot visibly and starting to smell disgusting.
Dimethylpolysioxene is added to the oil to prevent starches (and, as you can see, starches aren't just present in the nuggets--they're outright abundant.) from binding.

Problem: this chemical is a carcinogen.

What's more--and you'll like this--it's actually flammable.

Tertiary butylhydroquinone (TBHQ) is derived from petroleum and is an antioxidant that is actually sprayed directly on the nugget most of the time to preserve freshness. For those of you familiar with TBHQ, it will come as no surprise to you that TBHQ is a form of butane. Butane is lighter fluid.

That's two flammable ingredients in "chicken" nuggets from McDonalds. I'm starting to suspect that McDonalds is responsible for alleged cases of spontaneous human combustion.

TBHQ is allowed in small quantities by the FDA to be used in our food. This is a good thing that it is at least limited. A single gram of TBHQ, when ingested, can induce nausea, vomiting, delirium, collapse, and worse. Three to six grams of TBHQ can, and have, killed people.

source: http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/195157/exposing_mcdonalds_chicken_nuggets_pg2.html?cat=5